Murphy's Laws for Moms

Let's get real. Parenting sucks. This statement may not bode well with everyone.  After all, we like to tell people just how much of a blessing our children are to us.  We like to say that we would never take back the happiness that we have received from having children and becoming a parent.  We tell others that there is no greater gift than the gift of parenting.  And, while all of these things are true, parenting still sucks. People will tell you that different situations will prepare you for becoming a parent (like having pets or the loss of sleep in your last trimester), but they're wrong.  Nothing - absolutely nothing - prepares you for having children.  These tiny little beings who you love beyond belief will test every aspect of your humanity.  They will show you new limits of frustrations.  They will teach you that your patience can fully run out.  They will have you screaming and begging, at times, for it all to just stop. In...

Over this past weekend, I learned something.  If you've read any of my blog, you'll probably be thinking, "Well, duh! It was bound to happen."  But, for whatever reason, I didn't know it would happen.  I was dumbfounded.  And, I might have yelled at my child when it did happen. The sound of a toilet flushing in my house is not an uncommon occurrence.  However, when I hear it, I almost always cringe...What is my child flushing down the potty today?  Please, oh, please. Let it be bodily functions. Throughout the past year - as we've been potty training my 3-year-old - he has managed to flush dog food (the smell will make you nauseous), PB&Js (which will clog the toilet), My Little Pony figurines, toothbrushes, and more down the potty.  I have become quite adept at getting the toilets in my house back into working order after these incidents.  However, this weekend, something new happened. My children love to fish.  They've been severa...

As I seriously deliberated on which of this year's pictures would make the 2015 Family Christmas Card, I came across some definite outtakes.  Over the next few days, perhaps you can help me caption the pictures that did not make the Christmas card.  Starting with...

I try to keep my children occupied throughout the day - especially my three-year-old.  After all, I've learned, a busy child is one who is most likely not getting into things he (or she) should not be getting into.  However, every parent has those moments where you just have to step away.  Maybe it's to answer a knock at the door or a ringing phone.  Perhaps you need to make a meal.  Or, God forbid, you just have to go to the bathroom. This was my mistake.  Why did I think that I could simply go to the bathroom?  It wasn't as though I was leaving my child unattended.  We were in our own home and, not to toot my own horn I was having an exceptionally awesome parenting day.  We had spent the morning reading books and playing with trains.  Not once had my child had to entertain himself with the TV or other form of technology.  I might have required a cup (or three) too many of coffee, but I was on top of my game. And yet, I desperate...