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I have boobs

Focus.  I need to finish my shopping (without the kids grabbing any more unneeded items off the shelves), pay, get everything loaded into the car, get the kids home, feed them lunch, clean them up, get them to nap, and then I'll have some quiet time.  These are the thoughts I was having as I was speeding through the grocery store, desperately trying to keep my sanity.  The morning hadn't gone as I planned.  Actually, it started much earlier than morning since I had a newborn who, at five months old was still not sleeping through the night.  I had gotten maybe a total of four hours of sleep, 90 minutes of that being consecutive.  I hadn't gotten a shower, but was at least wearing clean clothes, matching socks, and had remembered to add some deodorant.   All I wanted were the essentials: milk, eggs, bread, coffee, and chocolate.  Only a few more aisles to go!

"Mommy, I HAVE BOOBS!!!!!"

Suddenly, you could hear a pin drop.  Everyone within 50 yards stopped and turned their eyes to me.  Great!

People use the expression, "Out of the mouths of babes..."  I much prefer to think of it as my own personal, and very effective, birth control.  We all know, if we have children, there will come a time when they say something (very loudly) somewhere you would prefer they didn't.  It happens.  They are learning so many new things and they're excited about all that they're learning.  They don't understand the concept that it might be an inappropriate public conversation topic which causes the parents humiliation.  In fact, they can't even pronounce humiliation.  The best thing to remember is that it happens to us all.  I like to think of it as better than your husband farting in public.  At least you can explain the child...

Mama Law learned: "If your child says something embarrassing while you're out in public, write it down (or blog about it) and remember to bring it up again at their high school graduation or wedding.  Or, better yet, scream the same phrase out loud when they're older and you're out with them in public (just kidding...I think).

Comments

  1. If it makes you feel any better, my friend's daughter yelled loudly in public that, "Mommy doesn't wear panties." To put the story in context, at their house, the parents' undergarments were referred to as underwear, whereas the little girl's garments were panties. So, technically, the kid was right, but....

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